The House of Skank

Ok, it's nasty here. For the past few days every single one of us has had some form of the flu. Head flu and stomach flu have been circulating around our house like it's cool. Well, guess what. It's not. After being com.plete.ly miserable on Tuesday, I had to summon up the strength to get Ethan to school on Wednesday so I could at least have some resting time. This would be the day Hannah woke up with a fever. A fever that escalated to 102.4 throughout the day. This is good and bad. The good part is that she laid around all day falling in and out of deep sleep. The bad part is that she wanted to this right next to me, so as if my hot flashes weren't enough, I had my very own personal heating pad drooling on the pillow next to me. Grant, through all this, was bubbly, smily and playful, and oh how I wish I could have played with him, but really all he wanted to do was grab at my glasses while I lay comatose on the floor.
My biggest fear was that Ethan would arrive home sick from school, since that's the way this all hit me on Monday. I was perfectly fine in the morning, and by 2pm I was a wreck. Thankfully, though, when Paul brought him home (p.s., thank you SO much!), Ethan was still his lively self. With no energy to grocery shop, or clean my kitchen, Paul planned to run to Panera (mmm) and grab us all dinner. 10 minutes later he arrived back, Ethan in tow, and ran right up to the tub. No, NO, NOOOO! Yup. He threw up all over himself in the very back seat of the van. All I have to say is leather cleans up fairly easy.
Let's not fail to mention that The Man of the house is also sick through all of this, but seems to maintain composure for the benefit of his family. You amaze me with your ability to hold it together for the sake of us. You truly are stoic.
I finally made it to the Dr today and, with the same treatment as last time, have some how started to feel a bit better.  I still am a little queasy and light headed, however nothing to the extent of Tuesday's "worst day ever" (in my book at least). And all this happens the DAY after Paul and I sit down and come up with daily, weekly and monthly schedules and routines to get our lives back in some sort of a "non-survival mode".
Well wasn't that a nice how do you do!? We'll try this schedule thing again next week.

Little Helpers

I constantly wonder how I can make helping mommy look or sound fun. Apparently I haven't found it yet. Everything I say (even bribery with chocolate or lollipops) has not seemed to work. Ethan's stock answer is , "I can't right now because I'm __________." [to tired, sick, wearing a shirt] pretty much anything that would sound like an excuse to a four year old.
Hannah eagerly answers with a "YEAH!" and then gets distracted the second she leaves to do the "chore".
Grant and Louie are useless. I'm done trying with them.

So this topic brings me to todays post. We've been trying the whole have-to-clean-up-before-we-start-something-new routine. And I guess you could say it's going pretty well. It takes A LOT of help on our part to get them to actually do it, but it's teaching them something (i hope). So today, I'm loading the dishwasher while the kids are playing upstairs. Both come down and Ethan says, "puh! ewww, yuck, I can smell Hannah's poopy diaper!" (This would be the third one of the day. She's obviously sick).
"Hannah did you poop?"
"ya, i poop." (can you tell we need to start potty training!?)
"ok, mommy has a few more dishes to go, can you go get your diaper and the wipes for me and I'll be right there to change you?"
"YEAH!"
Off they go into the living room.
Then. It happens.
Ethan decides right then that this would be the perfect time to be mommy's little helper.
Right then. My hands are wet and soapy. Louie's scratching at the door. Grant needs a bottle. Ethan wants to change Hannah's diaper. yeah. ok. you get what I'm saying here?
He comes in the kitchen with a poopy wipe in his hand saying, "eww..this stinks!" (I can't control my laughter while typing this)
I freak!
I enter the living room to find 3 wipes (dirty) on the floor next to a filled diaper and hannah staring up at me, with NOTHING but carpet underneath her butt. (Did I mention she was sick!?)

So, you can't clean up the legos cause you "have to get underwear on". You can't put your clothes away because you're "wearing socks". You can't even eat your food, because you're "seeing what that noise is". But you WANT to change a nasty diarrhea poop of your sister's because you're 4 and you know how to do it!??!?!

I need the number to the nearest mental hospital.

Chittlins

So I can't help but wonder if I'm in for a lifetime of stress.
Part of the joy of having three kids under 5 is that we'll be "getting it out of the way" all at once. Not like I don't enjoy it, but you know, that's just what they say. You raise them all at once and then you're done. You're not starting over in 5 years with another bottles bibs and burpies. Stupidly, I thought that would mean this would be somewhat easy? What was I drinking when I had that epiphany?
I just gave thanks to the Lord that Ethan has moved beyond the stage of screaming/crying over food. As in, every morning, no matter how careful we were, something about breakfast was not prepared correctly. And we all know that "Actually mom, I didn't want syrup on the pancakes, I wanted it in a bowl so I could dip it, but that's ok, thank you so much for a great breakfast even though it's 5 am and I know you'd rather be sleeping, etc..." is not a part of a 2-3 year old's vocabulary. I guess they just know that crying over it will make us do anything to make it right. Nevertheless, the kid has moved on. Moved on to pleases and thank you's, excuse me's and may I's. It was wonderful...for the 1 day it lasted. Then it was like something in Hannah's brain clicked. "Wait a minute, polite? what's that? I want what I want right now and I'm gonna get it no matter what!". She has decided to pick up right where E left off. I dealt with it for 2 years, stressful mornings of walking on eggshells, and now it's Hannah's turn. So 2 more years of this, seriously? I don't know if I can handle that. Because now I'm thinking, when she stops, Grant will start, and then when he's done, it will be Ethan's turn to start the "I hate you's and you're the worst mother ever!" phase... And then is that all gonna repeat, and then Hannah will hit the "boy crazy" phase, and my sons will have girlfriends, and fights, and school issues, and Oh my, I don't know if I can even deal with this!
I guess I'll just have to take it "One Day At a Time", like the AA members say. Because let's face it, being a SAHM is almost like recovering from an addiction. An addiction to thinking it's all about me.

TECHNO FREAK-ing out

I rely on my electronics.I really do, I'm the person that has no idea what my best friend's phone number is because it's in my speed dial. Why would I need to remember it? I don't remember anyone's website, email address, even personal address. They are all in my computer. All of them. Hmm. So what happens when there is an unexpected power outage and everything all of a sudden starts getting quirky? The Mail application quit unexpectedly, every. single. time. I open it. 

My sync software somehow thought I wanted to erase all of my 188 bookmarks (internet favorites) and replace them with nothing. Nothing. 

No bill pay websites, friends' websites, knitting patterns, homes we were looking at, and more importantly, SHOPPING websites!!! I've lost every single one. I can't get them back. I could have, if I would've bought the $500 "Time Machine" hard drive...but Macs aren't supposed to fail. Right? RIGHT!??!!?

I'm starting to understand why my parents don't get into electronics more. 

When you write something down and put it in a safe spot, the only way to totally lose it is if you have a house fire, and that's when friends will understand that you don't have they're phone number, not when you tell them "I'm sorry, I relied on my computer's memory instead of showing your significance in my life by memorizing it myself." So, the moral of the story is be careful what you purchase with the thought of it making your life so much easier, because sometimes, it ends up being a bigger pain than a benefit. Trust only yourself, and not some machine that will inevitably fail you.